Lifeline on a Page

I knew he was going to die-
The first three chapters had set the stage for disaster but
It wasn't long before her words drew me in before
His pulse crawled off the page and into my wrist and
I could practically taste the sting of his sweat
On my tongue
So around chapter fifteen my fail-proof denial kicked in and
I was suddenly convinced there had to be some kind of
Mistake
Reading each sentence twice, trying too hard
Not to cry
Because the back seat I was trapped in wasn't nearly big enough for my sorrow
And between gulps of emotion I looked up and
Straight out the window
Blinking carefully and trying to keep my place
In the plot…
Just when I thought I couldn't take any more
You said you had to run into the shop for a second and
I found myself lifting the lock and slipping outside
The sunshine soaking into my skin and
Rendering me
Momentarily
Blind
I let a steady stream of strangers wash around me on mute
Crouched in an unoccupied parking-space
Trying to swallow the jagged sobs I felt beginning to surface
Dripping tears through my fingers,
Making all the ink run
And through the blur of my vision
I saw you coming toward me
Plastic bags whispering as warm wind drifted between the folds
Your face wore an expression I didn't have the energy to define so
I stood up and
Dusted myself off
Indentations from the road like private scars on my palms and
I exhaled for the first time that morning
Closed the cover and started again,
From the beginning
Just to bring him back
To life